Walking in the Dark
Yes, December is here, and I am still in the U.S. My acquisition of a work visa has been a longer process than anyone had anticipated. Admittedly, that can be pretty frustrating at times. There are a lot of unanswered questions that run through my head, and it’s easier to just not think about them rather than to seek out the answers, and instead keep my eyes on what’s directly in front of me. It feels like I’m walking on a path in the dark, with light only enough to see what is exactly in front of me, not even what’s beyond the next step. I don’t know what next week looks like, or next month… Read more >>Standing in the Gap Between Here and There
The past few weeks have felt like an emotional game of redlight-greenlight. I've gone from being fully funded, with a job and expecting to leave, to a restarted visa process and an ambiguously delayed departure, and have now been given a potential opportunity to leave soon. Soon as in, sneeze and you're on the plane. So my heart has been fluctuating between itching to leave and finding solace in being home. We've been told in training to make sure to say our goodbyes well before leaving, but uncertainty of my departure date has made that hard to do so far. To have that suddenly flipped… Read more >>So you're an undercover missionary, right?
I’ve gotten this question quite a few times already this year, or some other variant like, “so the government thinks you’re there to do X, Y and Z, but that’s really just a cover-up to get you in the country so you can save people, right?” At the beginning of the summer, I agreed with a number of people on that, but at this point, the idea has started to trouble me. Some will hear my reservation, shrug, and say, “eh, semantics,” but when you consider that most conflict arises out of misunderstanding, I’d say that the semantics are just as important as the message! There’s something about the… Read more >>
Waiting While I Work... Or Should I Reverse That?
Right now is an exciting time of celebration - two of my team mates are fully funded and one has already deployed! But if I'm going to be honest, there's a part of me that is disappointed. At the beginning of the summer, my goal was to leave at the end of this month. Actually, with that goal, I would have already left! I'm disappointed in myself for not making more phone calls, getting more appointments, spending more time working. I'm disappointed that my flight isn't one of the ones that is already booked. There is this growing heap of disappointments piling up on me, but it all comes down… Read more >>