GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD
I pride myself on being capable and getting things done for myself. Maybe it is because I am stubborn or just fiercely independent but asking for and receiving help does not come easy to me. One can imagine then that the idea of support raising was not at all appealing to me. My initial thought was that I was going to be essentially begging people to give me money so that I could go to North Africa. And with that came the self-doubt and this feeling of being trapped. By then I had turned down job opportunities, withdrawn from seminary, ended my housing lease, and I had even rehomed my dog. In a sense, there was no turning back and my only option was to trust God.
While I am fickle, fearful, and doubtful, the Lord is steadfast and gentle in His dealings with me. Through the summer months leading up to my first training with GoCorps, I received my pre-assignments and the book The God Ask. Through this book and His Word, the Lord began to humble me and teach me to trust Him for all that I am and have. The Levites were set aside in service to God, their wages came out of the tithes of the people paid to the Lord who, in turn, used those tithes to provide for His priests (Num 18:21). Paul, a tentmaker by trade, had to depend on other believers at times to provide for his needs during his travels to proclaim the gospel. He writes to the Philippian church to commend and thank them for their partnership with him when others would not (Phil 1:3-5; 4:15-20). Even more profoundly, our own Lord in His earthly ministry, was provided for by others (Luke 8:1-3).
Through these, I began to learn that support raising is vertical, it begins and ends with the Lord. Support raising is an invitation to the giver to partner in ministry with the Lord first and then myself. It is God who stirs the heart of the goer to go and God who stirs the heart of those who send through their giving. I need to be faithful and make the ask and trust that God will provide in His way and in His timing. Christ said to not be anxious about anything, that our Father knows all that we need before we even ask Him, and we are to seek first His kingdom (Matt 6:25-33). In this journey of raising support, I am learning to walk by faith every day and not worry about tomorrow. As I prepare to go about a month from now, I am so grateful for all my ministry partners. They have been so faithful in their love and prayers for me, and it is an absolute honour to embark on this crazy adventure of following Jesus together with them. Our Lord has been kind to me. He has been with me every step of the way, He quiets my fears, and shows me that He is my shepherd, and I need not want.