It's so fun getting to know a new culture and country.
Getting to explore something completely new. Everything feels different, you need a nap just from going on a walk or a 10 minute conversation.
Its like your brain is smooth again, you are a child once more. Your abilities are no longer self sufficient, you rely on others for your eyes and ears. Your tongue no longer communicates in a way that others understand.
The information you were an expert in is no longer useful.
Simple things like a conversation now take, at the minimum, of deciphering an accent but often times takes a whole extra person.
It is a challenge so tangible, yet so abstract. And to be among the few to concor it, to face the confusion and exhaustion and know, one day at a time, you did it. You kept going. You made a foreign place; a new people, home.
No one can take what you have done away.
If you know who you are, stepping into a new world, some of your bones may be broken. You will learn to walk again stronger than before.
If you still have yourself to find, going will turn you inside out.
This was my path and every moment of pain was worth it.
If you have the rock of Jesus, there is a reason for everything.
You will be tested and beaten down, and when you bring your questions and tears to Him, He will hold you. When you ask Him what will make it better, the answer may be time.
For this battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the dark forces of the spiritual realm. Christians are in a battle, you are God's warrior. God wants to strip you clean of your pain and burdens, but it is a humbling and difficult process. It was for me, because I fought Him. I fought to stay the same, to stay afraid, to hold on to old patters and sins. I didn't want to get to know Him. His presence scared me. It still does.
But He just wants to sit with me, to love me. When His love flows over and through me, I am completely known. This is the greatest gift anyone can receive. True peace.
My strength is who I am in Him, He is only a thought away.
Yesterday I was thinking about what my greatest strength is, and I realized, it's that I can do all things through Him. We have moved mountains together.