A wave of brokenness flooded the month of July and I am behind on support raising. Dear family and friends opened their hearts to share their brokenness and sins, some were exposed, and I was on the receiving end. My heart ached not with anger and disappointment, but because I am a limited human being who falls short of helping everyone (and myself) carry their burdens. Knowing this makes it so much harder to deny Jesus (not that I’m trying to deny Him). Obviously, I can’t do anything to ultimately heal anyone and myself from their brokenness; only a Savior can.
God came through in July not like the calm after the storm; He was present through it all. God is present throughout every circumstance in our lives. Someone once told me that the peace of God does not have to be asked for because it has already been given as one of the fruits of the Spirit. If the Spirit lives in us then we need to trust and rest in Him. Knowing everyone’s brokenness and falling short on my support raising was tough for me. However, God was truly reminding me to trust and rest in His peace. I am grateful for the Spirit who helps guide me to keep loving and to keep persevering.
God’s peace that surpasses all understanding was truly reigning over my short-lived discouragement of being at 29% of my support raising at the beginning of July. Deep in my heart, I felt God asking me if I would still say yes and accept what He has for me even if I don’t launch to Thailand this December. Boy did I had to check my heart! I had to ask myself if I was looking forward to going to Thailand more, or if I was looking forward to God with or without Thailand. Even if I don’t go to Thailand this Winter I will say yes to God for that. Of course, I am not settling for less so even after saying yes to what might not even happen, at least I know where I stand and that I have His peace in my heart to continue to do my best with raising support.
Saying yes to God again is truly blissful.