Over the last few months, I have been reflecting on my time here; how much I love this work and all the things the Lord has been teaching me. After a lot of prayer and reflection I have decided to extend my commitment by two more years (4 yrs in total)!! I am so thankful to be at a stage in my life where I can follow where the Lord is leading me. I am just getting started with my work here. I would love to gain more wisdom on how to do this work well and experience the Lord's grace and intimacy in this amazing country. So if you're thinking of going abroad and have certain plans for only a couple years, know that God could grab your heart in totally unexpected ways.
I will explain a little more about my decision. . .
I feel super called to serve at my church back in the states. There is no missions program there and I feel called to encourage and equipp people to go. Before leaving on my GoCorp commitment, I was planning to stay for 2 years and then come back to my church as a missions pastor. A lot of the staff at my church had this in mind too.
Well, I came to my GoCorp placement and I didn't have the typical 'falling in love with the city' moment. The transition was hard. I started going through intense cutlure shock around month 6. I was going through the typical shocks of exhaustion and having a hard time disciplining myself when my work and language study were taking so much out of me. BUT I believed so whole heartidly in the work that I was doing overseas. I have been learning about what it looks like to walk alongside the lost and to point to His glory in all my work.
Luckily, I got a chance to go home for Thanksgiving this year. I surprised my family and home church for a weeks time. While there, I realized how comfortable my home is. Not that comfortability is a bad thing. Sometimes God calls us right into it. But there are so many ways that living in the states encourages a life that doesn't RELY on the Lord. So many things are handed to you. Living abroad and working with refugees encourages a need to fully ABIDE in the Lord's presense.
I felt like something was turning in my heart with my decision to go back to the states after my two years. Living in the states is nicer in various ways. Friends, family, church life; all amazing gifts that I love to have when I am there. But I am at a stage in my life where I have the freedom to be uncomfortable! I am single, no kids, and have a drive to want to learn how to do this work better and of wanting to learn how to live with the Lord in deep intimacy. So maybe I would like my job better in the states as a missions pastor. There is still a strong calling to do that work. BUT the Lord has created this season for me to dive into learning and doing this sort of work.
I think both options are God honoring. That was the toughest part about making the decision. Has God ever said 'whatever you want' in regards to a decision? Sometimes it feels like the WORST! But what a God we have that He entrusts us and will be good to us no matter what!
I am excited to extend my time and see what the Lord has for me abroad :)