I want to start this post by saying that support-raising is going really well, and has been an incredible journey of God’s provision thus far! I reached 51% of my monthly support need this week, and if that’s not a testament to God’s provision, I don’t know what is! The word “humbled” does not even begin to describe how I feel towards the many, many people who have welcomed me into their homes, met me at church, gotten together for lunch or coffee, and allowed me to share the ways God has been writing my story up to this point and my heart for serving in Nicaragua. People I literally just met this week have joined my support team! That’s crazy! There has already been so much beauty in this adventure, but I am a huge proponent for honesty and transparency, so I feel it is important to share the not-so-pretty moments, as well.
We live in a culture of busyness. Sometimes it seems like we almost pride ourselves on it. Looking back now and having the benefit of hindsight, I am able to see that in college, I allowed busyness to take over my life and heart, and I vividly remember telling so many people, “Sorry, I’m really busy this (day/week/MONTH).” Thinking back, there are probably many precious moments I missed out on because of the number of things on my calendar and to-do list, and my limited attention to things outside of that. If I ever made you feel that I was too busy for you, or that you or what you had to say was not important to me, please hear me say this: I’m sorry.
The past four years, I’ve gotten to spend time in Honduras, Ecuador, and Puerto Rico. These places can largely be categorized as polychronic cultures. What this means (very generally speaking) is that people and relationships are valued more highly than the rigidity of the clock. A lot of the time, I love this, and I love the focus on those around me over the hands of time. There are have also been moments, though, when my U.S. culture and my boyfriend’s Latino culture clash on this matter. Here in the States, when we say we are going to go somewhere, we set a time to leave, make a plan for any stops along the way, and organize our schedule down to the minute. In Latin America, on the other hand, they may say we are going to leave soon, but there might be three or four solid hours of just hanging out with one another before that actually happens. Overall, people in Latin America are not as enslaved to the hands of time and busyness the way we are here in the States.
What does any of this have to do with raising support to move to Nicaragua? I’ll tell you. Over the past few weeks, in addition to just the regular busyness of many people I’ve reached out to to share about my ministry, there have been some people who have disregarded me completely or have very clearly not wanted to meet with me, and that has been hard. It hasn’t been hard because of anything related to money. I want to say that first and foremost. And if these were people I didn’t know or didn’t have relationships with, it probably wouldn’t hurt the way it does. It has been hard because most of these people are actually people I really look up to as women and men of faith who have played a role in my life (often in past mission experiences), and I have been so excited to share with them personally where God is leading me now! If every single one of those people were to call me today willing to meet and then decide not to join my support team, that would be okay. I’ve felt discouraged when I see people at my church or otherwise who I’ve really wanted to meet with who haven’t given me the time of day, have ignored a letter, phone call, and/or text, or have not had interest in taking even 30 minutes to hear about my ministry. If you’re thinking “don’t take it personal, Mandy,” I’ll tell you very honestly that I am trying really hard to take that road.
Moving out of the country for two years to serve where Jesus has called me to serve is big and exciting, or at least it feels that way to me. These moments are not in the majority, and for that I am grateful. I’m trying very hard not to feel like a burden to those in my church community who are not interested, and I'm so encouraged by the many, many people who have wanted to hear about Nicaragua.
What is all this teaching me? It can kind of be summed up in one word that doesn’t have an English equivalent—ánimo. The best way to describe ánimo would be roughly translated as “come on!” “keep going!” or “chin up!” Ánimo, Mandy. Ánimo. Ánimo, because God’s got this. Ánimo, because He is bringing prayer and financial supporters my way. Ánimo because I can’t let those not interested or those who’ve unintentionally made me feel like a burden on my journey to be a missionary deter my focus from my goal and from all the good things God is doing. Ánimo because so many incredible people do care, and ánimo because in about four months, I get to meet my team and my new home! Ánimo.