After I applied for a visa, I started to pack and get ready to depart with faith that God would provide me with the visa. God, however, had a different agenda. I ended up getting denied 2.5 weeks later and found myself on my knees that evening asking God with tears in my eyes, “What do YOU want, Lord?” A question I’ve been asking a lot during my journey of support raising. Rather than asking why this is happening, I knew I had to ask what do I do with the additional time God has given me. Yes, I believe that God was behind every step of this visa process and this delay was just coincidental. Believing that, it was time now for me to figure out how I can cherish every minute God is giving me here.
I struggled, though. Especially as I felt pressure from outside and felt the need to live up to others’ expectations. Then, I was reminded of last time I was so people-centered and how I failed to hear God clearly. I had to radically keep myself God-centered, look to God, listen to God, and watch to see what His directives are going to be. Not too long after, I read Henry Blackaby wrote in Experiencing God, “God has a right to interrupt my life. He is Lord. When I accepted Him as Lord, I gave Him the right to help Himself to my life anytime He wants.”
As I studied more into that, I saw a pattern in God’s relation to His Kingdom workers. God chose to take 25 years to make Abraham a father suitable for Isaac. Those 25 years were to build Abram’s character and in response, he immediately began adjusting his life to God’s ways. God spent about 11 years building His relationship with David after anointing David king before David mounted the throne. God worked with Apostle Paul for about 10 or 11 years until Paul went on his first missionary journey. He wanted to redeem the Gentiles through Paul so He took that much time to prepare Paul for the assignment. I assumed that just because God was guiding me, I was prepared for the assignment.
God is still building my character and if I have to be honest with myself, the biggest thing God is teaching during this season is how to prayerfully be guided by The Holy Spirit to experience more of Him.
Join me in this season to stay centered on God.
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in Me and I in Him, he will bear much fruit; apart from Me, he can do nothing.” John 15:5