In the past month, three teammates have returned to the states due to the end of their time commitment. This has been difficult, as each member of my team is incredibly unique and valuable. They have been close friends, teachers of Hungarian culture and role models of passionate and authentic ministry. I feel this loss, and at the same time, it has become a start to a new and exciting next chapter. I haven’t read this chapter yet, but I can maybe read the title, and it looks promising! It is not a new story, starting from scratch, but a second chapter, building off of the previous one. I could not be opening this second chapter without the closing of the first.
As I think about how (I thought) ministry works, transition of team members sometimes feels like a forgotten factor. I don’t think we think through our year and consider the opportunity of change until it happens. Maybe it is too overwhelming of an uncontrollable factor, or perhaps it is purely unknown. In my experience, even if we’re expecting change, it was lightly considered in my original plan. It does not seem to be embedded in the theoretical ministry ideal.
As hard as change in our teams and communities can be, I am reminded of the value of this experience. We are forced to change our ways, invest time into new things, and reflect on how things were and how we’d like them to be different in the future. This stirring time is rich with opportunity. God is glorified as we say, “what now?”
Then things start to change. The time of loss dulls and the time of new opportunity slowly grows to be more exciting than daunting. The sense of impending change turns into a new reality.
Loss seems to be felt more by the left than those who leave, even though the leavers lose more than the left. For the left, the places of familiarity remain, but there is a missing element. When I left the states, I was the leaver, and I was so overcome by change in my new country that I could not focus on all that I left, but I was consumed by all that was new. Now, even in this new place, there is loss. The people that showed me my favorite café or restaurant or told me where to buy black beans have left. The places are still there and I am thankful that I discovered them with these people. However, so much of this city is somehow connected to whom I discovered it with, so I feel this loss in the most mundane circumstances.
Thankfully, this loss is not death, but a change towards new opportunity. Each of my teammates are moving on to new and exciting commitments. One is preparing to return next summer as a long-term staff member, and two are pursuing graduate school. I am able to take on a new place in our team, as I go from being more of a learner-observer or the “new person”, to become the short termer advocate!
My hands remain open to receive and celebrate the next step.