That was a common statement I heard this past summer as I was preparing to come here to Ukraine. "Me? Change? I don't think so." But I would nod my head and agree. I like to think I'm at the point of knowing who I am and what kind of person I want to be, so thinking about changing seemed...in all honesty.... stupid to me. But I think I missed the point. It wasn't my identity that was going to change, not my personality, not the core of who I am.... A child of God. So then what was going to change you ask? Well, if it's not who I am that's going to change, it's how I am that may experience some changes and has already.
I'd like to think that the changes have come in the form of valuable life lessons that will change the way I handle certain situations throughout the rest of my life. For the past four years of my life I have lived in a community of brothers and sisters in Christ, I had people who knew me, people who challenged me, and encouraged me to be the best that I could be. It was easy, when I had a need, I was surrounded by friends and friends that became like family. But then, I moved to Ukraine, I left that community back in Pennsylvania (yes Messiah students... You will one day miss that community... Maybe not the word, but definitely what it is) and moved somewhere where no one knew me, I had to start over. So from this I learned a couple things that I will highlight.
1- I am learning what loneliness is, what it feels like, and that when you feel alone... You aren't. God is always with us. He is our constant companion. So when you have a need, you go straight to Him (see Deuteronomy 31:8, Joshua 1:9, Matthew 28:20). It used to be so easy to just go straight to a friend for help with something and only go to God when things got "really bad" but being here, I've learned to go to God first and not be dependent on people. Life changed.
2- Gosh vulnerability. I hate it. But when you leave your comfort zone... You're going to have to be vulnerable. Tell someone you are sad, tell someone you miss home. Tell someone you are struggling. But with this vulnerability comes a new sense of community. Life (still) changing.
Then there are life lessons you learn because you are in a new culture.
1- Flexibility. Anya and I will give you the best example of this one... It took us a whole day to buy a TV. At home- you go to the store, buy the tv, pay for it, take it home. Easy. Well- for some reason things aren't that easy here. So you learn to be flexible when things don't go the way you've planned. I'm a list maker and a goal setter. I tend to get stressed when things aren't going the way I've planned. Being here has taught me (even more than being a RA) to be flexible. Life changed.
2- Be mold-able. I know what you're thinking... "Julie aren't you trying to convince us you can't change." Well, yes I am... But I'll tell you who I am, Julie a child of God and daughter of the King, is not going to change... But being here has taught me to be mold-able. I'm in a new place.... I need to learn new customs, new traditions, and I need to be ok with them. Life (continually) changing.
All in all I try to think I'm still the same person... But maybe new and improved =]. So if you told me "you're going to change so much," thank you. I may have just nodded my head and agreed with you- but you were the wise one and I just missed what you were saying.
But the best part is, I don't think you need to go to Ukraine to learn these things or make these life changes.... You can decide to do this right where God has you.
Julie
Update:
- My mom was here for a short visit- we got to spend 3 days exploring Uzhgorod, introducing her to my new life here, it was a great time and I'm glad I got to see her.
- we officially raised all the funds for the next stage of the ministry center (which is the cafe)!!!!!! Thank you all for praying and donating! I am excited to get to work and start making this space an amazing place to be used by God.
- continue praying for our student ministry and English fellowship time that meets on Sunday afternoons in my apartment. It has been really encouraging to get to know these students and see their hearts for God and desire to reach their peers and fellow students!