God heals people and continues to do miracles as He did in the Bible. I believe God still raises the dead, heals the blind, and feeds the multitude. Jesus promises in John 14:12, “Very truly I tell you, whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing, and they will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.” God is leading me into this promise, among others, and showing me more of what “greater things” means in a life lived out for the Kingdom of God.
Jesus did not construct big gatherings and plan outreach events. Jesus was God incarnate healing broken people everywhere he went everyday he went. With everything said, this is what God is leading me toward—living out the gospel and living fully surrendered to God as a vessel for Him to use and flow through everywhere I go.
I’m at the point right now of realizing how uneasy this is for me. If my love for God is not the support for my response to His calling, my labor is empty. This is the hardest part. It’s not just a matter of faith in entering into the lives of strangers as the Lord leads, but it’s doing so not out of guilt and feeling I have to, but doing so out of love for God and for people. God is calling me to a lifestyle lived in full surrender to Him. That is also hard as I like control, I like to plan, and I like to know what I am doing with my time. Also, I can’t just follow through day by day, praying for people for healing, giving to the poor, and sharing the Gospel without having love behind it. It’s empty. It’s not a sacrifice pleasing unto God if it is not an overflow of Him, who is love.
Also, I am at a point where I try to use bad motivations to move myself into action. For example, I was at a point of grief a couple of weeks ago—I was broken, feeling disobedient to God. I would see people on my street, on the U-bahn, in my language school who struggled to get up the stairs because of hip problems, who had broken arms, who had a broken leg or torn ACL. My eyes are open to ailments that Satan has brought from hell to torment mankind (if you don’t believe these things come from hell, then where do you believe they come from? They are not in God’s kingdom and are therefore not from God Himself). I know Jesus has given power and authority for us to destroy this evil in his name (Lk. 9:1-2, Mk. 16:15-20, Jn. 14:13-14), but I hit a point where I was afraid to being stepping out in faith. As a result, I felt guilty and disobedient. I felt as though I was fighting God…and then I began telling myself, “I will get to the point where I will be tired of fighting and finally step out.” I shared this with Evette, my Christian roommate, and she gave much encouragement and shared that truth that the result this way will be short-lived. She’s right. I may step out in faith after being tired of fighting, but what happens if I then pray for someone and they aren’t healed. What then? What foundation do I have to stand on? Then I will likely be worse than before because I was not standing on the solid rock of God’s word and love, trusting that He knows what is best and that I am just asked to love Him and others and be faithful with the talent He has given me (Mt. 25:21).
I also try to motivate myself by manipulating my people-pleasing nature. “Oh, if I do this, it will impress or encourage this person.” Or, “I want to show this person an example of what it means to step out in faith….so I will do it right now!” That is not good, either. The root is sick. And if I try to use sick roots decayed by pride or lies, I will only yield bad fruit, even if my goal is to try to obtain good fruit for God’s kingdom. The Holy Spirit has to flush that muck right out.
Point number one: Be compelled to act by God’s compelling love, not by guilt or twisted motivations. Actions overflowing from God’s love is pleasing unto Him and all other is vain and leads to more harm that will just need to be fixed later.
The other thing that God is teaching me is that I need to really get my identity. For real!!! Who am I in Christ Jesus? And who am I not? I AM God’s child (Jn. 1:12); I am united with the Lord, and am one in Spirit with Him (1 Cor. 6:17); I am a saint (Eph. 1:1); I am free from condemnation (Rm. 8:1-2); I am redeemed and forgiven of all my sins (Col. 1:14); I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (2 Ti. 1:7); I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me (1 Jn. 5:18); and so much more. The knowledge of the infinite realms of God’s love for me and knowing my identity in Christ therefore casts out all fear and all obstacles. For real!!!! That’s awesome!!!! God lives in us! We have the victory over sin and we can stomp out evil we see in this world in the name of Jesus because his name is powerful! Because HE is victorious and lives in us!
Point number 2: Know who your Father is and know who you are in Him.
These two points are huge. And I don’t have either of them straight in regard to practice. But I am excited for what God is doing. :)
This is not what I intended to write at all, actually. I wanted to share testimonies with you all of things God has been doing the past few weeks. But I will just have to save that for the next post. :) Hopefully by next week I’ll share more. Because God’s really awesome and I hope that this is an encouragement. Push into Him with all that you have. We can busy ourselves with so much stuff—Bible studies, worship services, ministry meetings—but if that is all that’s filling our lives, we won’t be equipped to fulfill the calling God has for us. It’s our relationship with Him first and then out to others. Seek Him in the solitary place (Luke 4:42, 5:16, 6:12).
Lord willing I will be doing that this weekend as I desire to take a 3-day retreat (this Friday-Sunday) to get away and pursue Him with purity and focus. Please pray for me in this time. Please pray for my mind—that I will be completely focused and un-interrupted; that I take every thought captive and surrender it unto Him for transformation. Pray for deep washing and renewal of the Holy Spirit. That I be prepared—”flammable”—walking into this retreat and come out ignited by Him. Thank you!!!