A few weeks ago, I found myself asking God, “Are my efforts in vain? Are my prayers in vain?”
I felt disappointed and discouraged because I wasn’t seeing the progress or the fruit I had hoped to see as a result of my efforts. Although I try to love and serve the women we work with well, their situations are so complicated and the economic reality in Ecuador is so hard that the feeling of helplessness made me doubt whether it was really possible to make a difference. I felt the same way about fundraising for the ministry Despite my efforts, we don’t count on the financial support or connections I feel like we need to sustain the ministry long-term. It seemed like my efforts were simply too small to be enough.
That same day, weighed down by discouragement and doubt, I went to the historic center for our monthly distribution of gift cards, medicine, and donations. Towards the end, one of the women we serve who is pregnant arrived to receive clothes for her baby.
As we talked, Carmen* shared that she had been going through very severe prenatal depression. She couldn’t eat or sleep, and often felt like even breathing was a struggle. In her desperation, she got to the point where she wanted to die; she asked God to take her life. But in those darkest moments, God met her. Carmen told us that, while going through some papers, she found a small note we had given her 3 years ago with the phrase: “Jesus, I trust in You.” And so she prayed, “Lord, I can’t go on anymore, I give myself to You.”
Once she surrendered herself to Jesus, Carmen began to see changes in her life. Thanks to the Lord, she connected with a psychologist who prescribed medication that is helping her recover from the depression. Her most recent medical exams show that both she and her baby are healthy. Not only that, but after 3 years of waiting, she also received her visa. She will now be able to move to another country to be with her family and, in her own words, find “a dignified job,” away from prostitution.
My teammates and I were deeply impacted and encouraged to see that after 4 years of walking with and praying for Carmen, God worked through something as small as a note we had given her 3 years ago to change the course of her life.
But what impacted me most was what she said as she thanked us, because I felt like God was speaking directly to me through her words: “Your prayers are not in vain.”