After this outreach I was thinking of how much I needed to rest and yet knowing all that needed to be done. I then came down with the stomach bug and spent three days in bed and I can truly day it was the most healing week. No sickness is ever a victory of the enemy or a slip in the Father’s plan, it’s apart of it. The past two times O have gotten sick during these eight months of being away from home has always been an act of love from the Father. He knew my need to talk with Him and just be held as I weeped. Crying over fear, unmet expectations, and the ache of longing for home. I didn’t realize how deep my homesickness was nor my fear of the future after these two years. I knew He could handle everything I was feeling, but I didn’t know if I could. Once again He drew near. I got some great encouragement from close friends and the familiar voice of family. But the most comfort and care I was given was from sitting in His presence, Him picking me up and holding me as I cried over all the things in which I didn’t understand and was overwhelmed with. I had put so many expectations on how I would lead, I was overwhelmed with the weight of holding everyone and everything. He whispered “My child this was never yours, you don’t have to prove your worth to me, I know it, I established it, I carry you, I love you, slow down and be with me.”