You have probably heard a lot of talk about "desensitization". It's been huge in media, asking if there is so much violence on TV or video games that kids don't realize the consequences of violent actions. The term can be applied to a lot of things in life. You have coffee too often and are now desensitized to the effects of caffeine. You live in a noisy neighborhood so it no longer fazes you when someone is playing really loud music next door or when cars drive past. The room smells funny when you walk into it but within 15 minutes you are desensitized to the smell and it no longer bothers you.
Sometimes the hard becomes so common you stop noticing them or caring about them. Often it takes a fresh perspective to realize again what you've tuned out. This fresh perspective can be a change in environment or new variables coming into your environment. For example, over the summer I noticed that the goats were so fat and healthy looking. The difference made me aware of how skinny and sickly the goats here are as they tend to eat trash and don't have lush grass to graze on. At another time my new team mate mentioned how loud the people are on the bus. I asked if they were mad or just talking and I remembered anew how overwhelmed it was when I first got here. By my (home cultures) standards the people tend to talk loudly. It's not extra aggressive but when you don't know what anyone is saying it can be stressful. I had adjusted and gotten used to the louder volume and now it doesn't really bother me. But through her comment I could see the situation with fresh eyes again (or in this case, hear with fresh ears).
One final example: I don't take many pictures so it's fairly easy to choose which ones to share since they are my only options. But I try to choose ones that are beautiful and show off the beauty of the land. However after I send the email I often get responses about how horrible the trash is or how sad the area looks. That is never my intention with sharing. My hope is that people could understand a bit better the country and see the beauty as well. The trash is just so prevalent and wide spread that I don't look at it too much anymore. I can see the beauty beyond the trash. But when people comment I see it again with fresh eyes.
Overlooking livestock and trash on the ground is one thing. It ranks there with background noise and funky smells. Of course there are some things you will never get used to. For example, your body will not acclimate to or desensitize pain. It's a survival defense mechanism to make sure you don't die because you are ignoring or not feeling the pain.
Similarly there are some things here I don't want to become desensitized to. I don't want to become desensitized to the pain and poverty. To the people.
Not feeling the pain of other people's problems is a defense mechanism. We hold it at arm's length so that we won't be hurt by it ourselves and so we can think clearly to deal with the problem. This allows for perspective which can be a good thing and allow us to help.
But if we hold the pain too far away, we stop caring. We begin to judge the situation without any relevant or inside knowledge. We aren't able to show empathy or love. Love is a dangerous thing. To be willing to love means we are willing to get hurt. Yet that pain is better than the emptiness of not feeling the pain at all. For when we get rid of one we are limiting our ability to feel the other. No bad, no good. When we refuse to allow love in, and with it pain, we can become calloused.
I may not have answers or ways to help, but I don't want to stop caring when a beggar man asks me for money from outside the bus window at a traffic stop or a mother with an infant tied around her waist asks for food or a child beggar asks for something to drink, eyes pleading, whimpering to emphasize his point. I want it to break my heart and I want to respond in love, however I am able.
He said when I was hungry you fed me and when I was thirsty you gave me something to drink. The hard can be overwhelming and it is easy to become numb and unfeeling trying to defend yourself against all the hurt and the seemingly unending and unsolvable problems. However, people matter. Their pain ought to be ours. And if it matters, we should let it matter. Make it matter. Join them in the hurt. Join them with love.
I find myself continually asking the Father for more love. For the strength to see the pain and enter into the situations with the people where their pain becomes mine. And for wisdom to know when and how I should act.