The holidays are officially over meaning support raising is back in full swing. There are people to contact, appointments to make, relationships to grow, and (hopefully) funding to raise. With my late January deadline looming in the not-so-distant future, it feels like the final lap in Mario Kart. Will I cross the finish line in first place and meet my deadline for a March departure? Or will I leave in a later month?
Despite the stressful season that’s began, I’m grateful for the reflection time Christmas and New Years provided. One thought which has consistently entered my head is first half of the Lord’s prayer:
“Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.”
Matthew 6:9b-10
Most days, I don’t know how I feel about praying ”Lord, let your will be done.” Sometimes I think we pray those words to leave room for error. We might say these words, but instead of praying in obedience we can use the phrase as a scapegoat for our own uncertainty. We might as well say “Whatever happens, happens” regardless of whether or not God actually works in the moment.
The problem is that God calls us to lean into uncertainty. He asks us to trust His plan is best, but to fully accept His will we need to be at peace with His plan being different than ours sometimes. There will be moments where He might tell us “no” and there will be many moments where we do not have the foresight as mere humans to fully grasp the entire scope of His plan, let alone understand it.
Although I’m blessed to have my startup fully funded (Praise God!), there is a steep path ahead of me as my monthly budget is only 60% accounted for. With very few people left for me to contact (at least for now), I know I cannot finish this race on-time by myself. I feel like saying “This situation is very unlikely, improbable, and more or less bleak… BUT GOD.” Through trust in Him, whatever the outcome, I find my peace.
Jesus said:
“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
Whether He intercedes on my behalf and I finish on time, or simply tells me “not yet,” I am at peace. I think back to last spring when I had the option to forgo one of my majors, graduate early, and streamline my mobilization process. I could have began support raising months earlier potentially be overseas right now, but I had a strong feeling God wanted me at my summer internship. I didn’t know why at the time, but I can look back now and see there were many life lessons I had to learn.
I’m convicted God’s blessed my passion to go overseas and that France will be my next season of life. If I don’t make my first deadline, maybe there’s more to learn. That’s okay because I am at peace with His will, on earth as it is in heaven. I might finish my race in first place or I might be dead last, but I will finish. Until I cross that line, my foot’s on the gas. Full speed ahead, no looking back.