These past few months of support-raising have been wonderful – meeting new people, sharing my calling with people I’ve known most of my life, and getting to reconnect with those whom I haven’t been able to talk with for years. There isn’t anything quite like sharing my excitement to be a light for Christ in the lives of those who do not know Him with people from every part of my life. However, in all of the excitement, there is a crucial balance that the Lord has been sanctifying me in. This balance comes between my contentment in Him, including my trust in His timing, and my eagerness to go where He has called me to go.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says to, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, [and] give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you”. I would find it easier to follow His instructions here if they said to give thanks in what I call good circumstances, yet He uses the word, all. This consistent recognition and meditation on who the Lord is and what He is doing (and has done) helps me during this season to fix my eyes on Jesus (Hebrews 12:1-3). For the times when I fall short on following up with a potential supporter, or when someone has to reschedule, He is working through it all for good (Romans 8:28). Recognizing God is the one ultimately at work often tempts my heart to passivity, but David Mathis responds to this temptation well, saying, “God’s work does not make our work unnecessary; it makes it possible” (Habits of Grace pg. 13, ref. 1 Corinthians 15:10). (Click here for a free pdf of the book!) Every schedule created, letter sent, and phone call made is for the Lord (Colossians 3:23-24). Yet how can I still be eager for the future and content in the current circumstances that the Lord has worked for me?
By His grace, I yearn to go to Granada and share the hope, life, joy, peace, and grace that Jesus has provided me. I desire so deeply to go, but for this time now, I am still raising support. I recognize that it is ultimately good for me to trust in His timing, and that it is an opportunity to be fully invested where he has me currently. Whether that’s on a trip across the state, at home, or in my local community, my God is a faithful God. However, there are days when I am tempted to doubt and thoughts pop up. The devil lies to me by saying, “You aren’t good enough to go abroad. Look at those around you – put your worth in your performance. Your support will never come in.” Fortunately for me, my identity is in Christ, and in those moments, I have to preach the Gospel to myself, recognizing the new life in Christ and the surpassing worth of knowing Him.
Seasons come and go, but He is showing me more and more that regardless of circumstance, He is holding me fast (Psalm 139:10). I am able to trust in Him, His promises… His Word, knowing that, “The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever” (Isaiah 40:8).