Every summer, NGO explats in our country leave because of the climbing temperatures. I had mixed feelings, but stepping away has given me a new perspective.
I've had time to be still (which I hate, but I'm learning to enjoy) and I've had time to listen.
Here's some truth I needed to be reminded of (and maybe you do too): We do not make a difference.
Whoah, Grace, that's harsh.
Let me back up a bit.
*We* do not make a dent. As in, we're small and could not possbly posess enough power or skill to transform things the way we want to.
And that's okay. We are not the ones who bring the dead to life. We are not the ones who can truly make people understand the love God has for them. But, we can befriend people, for the sake of befriending. We do not have to make people our projects, we do not have to put pressure of accomplishing a thousand tasks. We can just be.
This does not mean I should not take my teaching position (that I absolutely adore) and toss it aside as it means nothing. It's not without purpose, but I have to rememember who gives purpose. I need to remember to constantly take a step back and make sure I'm not working because I think it'll bring more approval or results. Rather, this should be an overflow of worship.
My life is a result of the awe I have for God. It's because I truly believe He is worthy of worship I want to invite others in. I want to do things well because I know He delights in me. I know He loves my friends who do not fully yet grasp the depths of His undending grace.
I know he delights in using my passion of teaching for His glory. He can use what little we have to offer and use it as He pleases.
Out of obedience, I want my life to forever bend to what He asks. Maybe it makes a difference after all.