Adjusting to another culture is a long process that brings both joy and, at times, frustration. Before leaving the States we had acculturation training and talked about the freedom of “speaking in paradox”--expressing joys and sorrows in the same breath. A paradox is a seemingly contradictory statement, yet still true. For example: living here has been the most amazing experience of my life… and also the hardest thing I have ever done. An easy way my husband and I express this concept is by calling “paradox” our “pair of ducks”--the yay ducks and the yuck ducks.
I find myself speaking in paradox quite a bit as I work as a teacher here. I love teaching and meeting new people (yay ducks), yet everything feel disorganized and standards are much lower than what I am used to (yuck ducks). Normally I am able to bring these frustrations to the Lord and grow in patience and joy, but this morning I felt the yuck ducks taking over. I began to see areas of pride in my life that had been kept hidden while in America, yet gradually surface the longer I teach here. I felt sorry for myself, as though I deserved “better” teaching opportunities than what I have right now.
Our Heavenly Father is so gracious and patient. He opened my eyes to the Truth:
Jesus, the Son of God, taught as a servant. And He taught the Kingdom--something significantly more important than a second language. Yet He obediently taught in any context His Father told Him to, whether it was in the synagogues getting ridiculed by the Pharisees, or with just a couple of His disciples, or with the rejects of society. He could have immediately risen to the top, yet instead He chose to teach those who disregarded his teaching and eventually nailed Him to a cross.
And yet in all of history, the work and teachings of Christ had the greatest eternal significance.
No matter how many “yuck ducks” there are, who am I to think I “deserve” better? That I deserve to be recognized or thanked for the effort I put in?
And yet, the work He has given me is already more than I deserve. He has given me teaching opportunities that have eternal significance. Through teaching I am building relationships, strengthening connections in the community, and finding opportunities to share about my faith and hope in Christ.
Here is the paradox: I am a teacher, stumbling through a new culture (making countless mistakes along the way), and wishing at times that I could go back to what was comparatively “easy” in the States--teaching to the standards. Yet I am also a servant of Christ, learning from my Teacher, building relational connections that have eternal significance.