Never have I deeply thought about or developed a strong sense of my own ethnic identity.
And then I came to Thailand.
It’s not hard to imagine I’m an ethnic minority here. Every day since I’ve been here, if I have not been consciously aware of the fact that I am white, I have had the stares, body language, and interactions of everyone around me to remind me of it.
Naturally, we’re quick to notice what is different in our world. It’s human nature. In a sea of faces we’re going to notice those who do not look like the rest before we notice anyone else. In and of itself this is not a bad thing.
But then there’s the matter of ethnic identity.
If anything, being an ethnic minority in an ethnically homogenous culture for the past six plus months has given me a greater understanding of and increased empathy towards ethnic minorities in my home culture. The crazy thing is, even though I am a minority here in Thailand, it’s not the same as being a minority in America. Here, even as a minority, I’m held with high esteem. My skin is white, I’m American, and I’m a foreigner, which is often accompanied by overwhelming hospitality, being held in high regard, and a certain degree of privilege.
Having grown in up America – which, let’s be honest, is inseparable with white culture – I’ve never had to develop a strong sense of my own ethnic identity. Being white meant being a part of the dominant culture. Being white was my normal, so why would I need to preoccupy myself with something that’s just “normal?” I can’t speak to the experiences of other ethnic groups in America, but I think it’s safe to assume this is not their reality. With the dominant culture being as pervasive as it is, telling you messages like, “the lighter your skin, the better” and, “you’re only a part of the in-crowd if you know English,” you’re constantly faced with how different you are. You have the stares, body language, and interactions of everyone around you to remind you of it. So of course you’re thinking about it. Of course you develop a strong sense of your own ethnic identity – if nothing else, the dominant culture almost forces you to.
This awareness would be useless if it wasn’t challenging or didn’t instigate a change in our thinking. To those of you who are also Caucasian American, I challenge you to a greater awareness of your own ethnic identity. I challenge you to intentional community with those who aren’t the same ethnicity as you. I challenge you to a deeper understanding of what it means to be white, with all the privilege and ease of life it entails. Going through such a process isn’t comfortable or easy, but as the saying goes, nothing good ever comes easy.
As this post comes to a close, I would like to ask for grace. I have never had to deeply think about or develop a strong sense of my own ethnic identity. These things I have shared are just a few of my initial thoughts as I begin the journey of processing this part of my identity. For the ways in which my words caused any pain or were misunderstood, I ask for forgiveness. I know issues such as this are sensitive for many and the truth of the matter is that I am limited by my inherent bias as someone who is white and American, among other social characteristics. That being said, I am aware that there are many other facets of humanity worthy of attention – unfortunately, I am limited by time and space here and cannot touch on all of them.
In closing, it is my prayer that we would come to a truer understanding of each other, love more boldly, and embrace who we are as the beautifully diverse bride of Christ. It is in our diversity, and it’s vital counterpart, our unity, that we reflect the mystery and beauty of our Maker.
If that’s not amazing then I’m not sure what is.