Dear Future Goers,
Here is a letter that sheds a bit of light on my time in Bangkok, Thailand.
Biggest Lessons Learned:
Where to begin? While I served in Bangkok for about 2 years, there are many things that I learned. I learned that learning a tonal language is hard. But not impossible. I learned that we sometimes take for granted the little things we grew up with. For example: space to be alone. I never valued the space and freedom to be alone before I moved to another country that is filled with people everywhere you go. I now have learned to value those small things that make a big difference. I learned that while you are working for God, and working to teach others about God, you realize that you do NOT have everything together, actually quite the opposite. I mean, I am not trying to be prideful or anything, but there are certain things in my life that I felt I have improved or even reached a point where I have mastered it. Well, let me tell you something: living in a different country makes most things harder. And devoting yourself to God and His ministry makes you a target to the enemy and worldly temptations. So I learned that I don’t have everything put together, but that is okay and that I need to turn to Jesus for guidance. I learned that I am a super independent person, but living in a dependent culture taught me the importance of balance and flexibility. For example, if someone wants to hold my hand while crossing the street, I learned to stop fighting it and just show your appreciation for their thoughtfulness and care. I learned that ministry is hard and never happens the way you dream or expect it to. Literally. But it taught me to trust that despite my failed expectations or desires, God is in control. I learned that sometimes, you just have to take risks for the kingdom of God. Do not be afraid of how people will perceive you—I mean don’t go and yell at people to convert to Christianity—but when the Holy Spirit speaks something or puts something on your heart, don’t be afraid; Trust that He is guiding you in the right direction. There are so many other things that I learned, but these—to me—were the most important.
What did I wish I knew before moving to Bangkok?
I wish I knew everyone wears jeans EVERYDAY! I wish I took a good pair of flip flops to help me not slip and slide on the very slippery sidewalks. I wish I took more pictures of family and friends to share with others and allow them to connect with me better. Other then these small things, there really isn’t anything more.
Encouragement for YOU (Future Goers!):
We all have expectations, its apart of life—but instead of expecting small things, take Risks and Expect God to MOVE! Before I came to Bangkok, many people said not to expect anything because its only 2 years and don’t be discouraged when you don’t see any fruit. Well, although I agree that we shouldn’t go in with the expectations to change our neighbors, we should expect and allow God to move.
Many times I needed to put aside my own feelings and desires and beg God to show me what to do. But honestly, most times He was completely silent. And I mean SILENT! Sometimes I wondered, “why am I here,” “am I making a difference,” “why did You bring me here, God,” “why won’t You say something to me!” These questions and doubts plagued me many, many times throughout my two years. But do you know what? Although I literally went months without hearing the Lord, I continued to trust. I continued to pray. I continued the read the Word. I continued to confess to God my doubts, my struggles, my insecurities, my expectations, my failures, my anger, my everything.
And despite my fleshly struggles, God continued to MOVE in BIG Ways! I had neighbors come to my ministry team and ask to learn more about Jesus! They literally begged us to begin a bible study. I had youth walk up to me and ask me deep questions about Christianity and Jesus—without even ever mentioning those topics to them. By the grace of God, two young youth came to accept Jesus into their hearts! I had a neighbor come to my roommate and I at 2 am, asking us to pray for her son who was having a severe asthma attack at camp. Praise God!
Many people will tell you to not expect fruit, and in many ways I honestly didn’t. But I also regret not taking more risks and allowing God to show up. God wants to move in our hearts and in the hearts of those around us. My encouragement to you is:
Do Not be Afraid to Listen to God.
Do Not be Afraid to be Real with God.
Do Not be Afraid to be Uncomfortable but Allow God to Move in those Moments.
And I promise you, if you are real with yourself and God, ground yourself in God’s truths, cover yourself in prayer, and take risks for the Kingdom of God, He will show up.
May you be encouraged and know that God is always with you.
Joshua 1:9~ "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
All for His Glory,
Sarah