Honestly

Honesty. Sometimes that can be a hard word. However, it's an important virtue in our world. This past Sunday our pastor at church gave a message about Psalm 73. What struck me the most was that the psalmist was just being honest. How he felt was how he told it. Although I am an optimist, putting a positive spin on EVERYTHING, his message inspired me to think deeply about how I really feel about different things coming up in my life.

Honestly I hate the unknown. The recent earthquake in Nepal has reminded me that life is full of unknowns. We don't know when a natural disaster will hit, or when a terrorist group is going to attack innocent lives. We don't know what tomorrow will bring or even this afternoon. And I don't know what the future holds for me after this internship is completed. But what I honestly do know is that despite not knowing the future, I will live in the moment, filled with the joy of the Lord, abandoning all of my fears of the unknown proclaiming that in the name of Jesus we have the victory. We sang this song with 25 beautiful children last night when we went to the Children's Home to visit and teach a story during devotions time.

In the name of Jesus, In the name of Jesus we have the victory. Hallelujah, In the name of Jesus...

As I heard their voices loudly singing this refrain, I was reminded that at all times I want this song going through my head, especially during those times of the unknown.

Honestly I'm going to miss this place! I have two months left of serving in South Asia and I've made a life here filled with friends and family. My teammates are like my family, the women at church they are like my family. Together we've laughed, cried, and I go to them for wisdom and advice. I have friends that I hang out with, we go to the shop down the street to get a coke or go watch movies. I have a small shop where I go to buy eggs. As I approach, the owner and I always smile and have small chit chat usually talking about the weather. I have kids at church that run at me full speed, just to get a big hug. I have kids that ask me if we're going to have English class next Saturday and look so disappointed if I tell them we can't. This hasn't been just a two year trip; I moved to South Asia. It's been an adventure of a life time, which has forever changed me. As much as America is my home and will always be home, this place is also home for me.

After this internship is over, I don't know what's next for me. And honestly I have peace about that unknown. I'm walking with God and He is the same yesterday, today and forever. So I can honestly look to the future with excitement, knowing that I already have the victory in the name of Jesus. As I've been seeking out what's next, I can look back over these two years seeing how God has grown me, and confirmed my passions and giftings. He is faithful. He has never failed me yet and won't ever fail me. And I KNOW without a doubt, that whatever adventure is next, I'll be serving the Lord, working for His kingdom. Because as believers, that's what we're called to do.