There is something so refreshing about a new year! Even the first minute holds so much potential. So many weeks and days lay ahead and it seems like anything is possible. Truly it is with God. He says in his Word: “Is anything too hard for the Lord?”( Gen. 18:14 when telling Sarah she will have a baby in her old age.) He reminds us that “with man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” (Mt. 19:26). So in 2014, I wonder what things will be possible? What will the Lord, who is always working and always on the move, do?
To be honest, the past few months have been challenging. There have been many rough days as I wonder what my purpose is in being here. It has been confusing at times to be the only female teammate amongst guys whose roles as players and coaches of American football are clearly defined. My role is a bit more loose and blurry, and it’s been a struggle at times to fit in, find a niche or understand what God is doing with me, in me and through me here. It has been difficult to make female friends that I can truly connect with, and my motivation to leave my apartment and engage with the city has some days been extremely lacking. There have been physical challenges as for 2 weeks I was very sick with a cough and cold that kept me in the house for 10 days straight. There is the challenge of learning Turkish and feeling so often like I’ve hit a wall. There have been challenges to face and pray through in my marriage as we encounter new things and experience transition. So I am clinging to the fact that, with God, anything is possible. I am hoping and praying for the refreshment that only He can bring.
In the early hours of 2014, I wrote this poem as I reflected on the goodness of Christ and the fact that, no matter what is happening or where we are, when we know Him we always have a home where we can feel loved and cared for. Some of the lines may seem a little depressing, but it was written in the spirit of hope and thankfulness to the One who holds all things together. It was inspired by a verse I am claiming for 2014: “Since you are my rock and my fortress, for the sake of your name lead and guide me.” (Ps. 31:24)
When the days can be lonely and the nights get long; Don't feel I have a place to go; I know there's one man I can always meet...His name is Jesus; I find my home at his feet.
When the days are lonely and the nights are too; Don't feel I have anyone to see; I know there's one man I can always call...His name is Jesus; I find my home in his arms.
The days can be dragging and the nights, they scream; Don't feel my thoughts are known; I know there's one man who can help me rest...His name is Jesus; My home is pouring my heart out against his chest.
He is my home; The only home I want; Where rest and comfort abound to me; He's built of trust and peace and grace; This beautiful home shines from His beautiful face.
So lead me home, Jesus, led me home; Where your light beckons to me; Guide me home, Jesus, guide me home; Where your hope can set me free; Your home is where I need to be.