Being Strong
June 19, 2019 So this last Sunday, Penacost Sunday, I was battling within myself. A week prior I had been asked to share my story with a small group and so I had been thinking it through and trying to decide how much to include. This had caused me a great deal of stress and so that week many things had reminded me of my story and set off a chain reaction of me thinking through my personal trauma. This had reached a fever pitch by Penacost Sunday. I was so torn between the freedom of giving my story to Christ and the fear and shame of telling my story to people I barely knew. During the... Read moreI Learned Something
June 18, 2019 Feeling loved and safe is, and always has been, my number one priority. Feeling disapproval equated to not being safe and therefore needed to be avoided at all costs. It was explained over and over to me in Church that I could not earn God’s love. The only way I was comfortable receiving love was through earning it. So hearing that I couldn’t earn God’s love was not comforting. I couldn’t accept any free love because it wasn’t dependable. God was like a parent who obviously loves their child, but is never pleased with them. Never being enough and not being able to do anything... Read moreBuilding for the Next Step
May 23, 2019 Looking back on the last three months of waiting, I am so thankful that I’m not the one in charge. Even just this last month God has shown me so many things about myself. God is so actively moving in the stillness. I had realized that I constantly reflect and mirror myself to the people and situations going on around me. I was able to start questioning that reflex and very actively working against it. Picture always needing to feel approval and striving for it whenever it is not felt. So in situations that are predictable and comfortable it is generally easy for me to do this,... Read moreMy Puzzle
July 24, 2018 Counseling is basically bringing a puzzle to a professional puzzle solver. Telling the truth about how you made the puzzle, but how the puzzle is messed up because of people and choices. Giving the counselor all the keys to the puzzle that you have, and admitting that you've done everything you can to solve the puzzle and you can't figure it out. And then the therapist listens to all the ways your puzzle was broken and made harder by things you couldn’t control. And they listen to you cry about how the puzzle is stupid and worthless and how you don't want your puzzle anymore.... Read more
One Step At A Time
Breathe In. Breathe Out. 2 weeks. 13 days. 312 hours. This is how much time I have left until I catch my flight to Berlin, Germany. How does this make me feel? Anxious. Nervous. Excited. This is the moment that I have been preparing for for over a year now and here I am: saying my last goodbyes and turning them into “see-you-laters”, packing up my room and my suitcases, enjoying the last of the American food that I will have in awhile, stocking up on peanut butter, filling out final paperwork, raising the remaining of my support, and convincing myself I don’t need to bring my entire closet... Read more![[Posing with the GO letters at GoWeek!]](https://gocorps.org/sites/default/files/styles/extra_large/public/blogs/2019Rosie/Pic-%20Blog%201_0.jpg?itok=QwbOKvYT "[Posing with the GO letters at GoWeek!]")
What's up World?
Hellooo World! Or anyone who may be reading this now! Welcome to my first blog entry! I'd like to start off by introducing myself. My name is Rosie Sawatzki, and I recently graduated from the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor. While I was there I studied Spanish and Education, was very involved in my church and college group, and very in love with my work of being a Resident Assistant to the incoming freshman girls who came into the dorm I worked and lived in. Instead of taking the traditional route of going into teaching right after graduation, I decided to do something... Read more